Be Strong. Take Heart.

Still Here

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am still here, still fighting.  I haven't written in several days because I really haven't felt inspired to write.  Because I am in this "holding pattern" waiting for tests, I really have been struggling with getting through the day to day stuff.  I have seen a few doctors in between my last blog entry that really have made me question why some people even go into medicine.  I realize that I have a rare disease and on top of that have something even rarer developing.  But that doesn't excuse a doctor from having decent bedside manner and courtesy towards me.  I have had two different doctors that have had to look up Behcet's while I in their office.  They could have at least had the decency to leave the room to do something like that.  That means that I know more than they do right off the bat about the disease so why am I bothering with their opinion.
Anyway, as painful as that has been, friends have still been good to us helping us here and there.  God knows we need it desperately in the form of financial, friendship and just being there to help take some of the stress off of our backs.  I am not going to the Behcet's conference in Orlando.  I am too weak to travel that far by car and we really don't have the money to stay in the hotel and get a rental car.  I will find another way for us to have a small summer vacation with the family.  Hopefully I can get off of the waiting line for these tests and find out what's next.
I am still not playing music like I want because of the severe carpal tunnel but I will get on it as soon as it subsides.  I think that has a big art to do with my depression because I have no outlet for my creation.  And, that outlet closing has stunted my writing on the site as well.  I did receive a new computer to work with and it is very exciting to me to see what we can get going with it.  Mary has some brilliant artwork that she is creating and I will use it one day when my mind is a little more rested.
Thanks again to everyone for their support.  We are still here so please stay with us along this journey.  I know this is the tough part of a journey when you have to get close to someone dealing with a potential tragedy.  But it is also being next to that person that helps them possibly avert the tragedy or have positve things come from it.
Best to all of our friends and supporters!Andy
Andy BarwickComment