andybarwick

Be Strong. Take Heart.

Learning to Walk



Yes, I’m still here for those still listening.  I haven’t written since my August 30th surgery because of so many reasons.  I never knew that this would be one of the hardest things that I have ever had to fight through in my life.  First and foremost, the surgery was a success.  I go back to New York next week to get checked again by the surgeon to make sure everything is growing correctly and that the new vertebrae the doctor built for me on the fly is healing well. 

I want to thank everyone that has been praying for us.  I tell you that I have felt the hearts of so many asking for mercy for my condition and a new life for my family.  I feel like every week I am getting stronger and better.  One of the good things right now is that since my immune system is occupied with such a massive healing, my immune system is not overrunning my nervous system like before.  The central pain that ran throughout my entire body has disappeared, at least for the moment.  I’ll take it the break even if it is temporary.  For three years non-stop, I have been bombarded by the suspected NeuroBehcet’s and its relentless attack on my body. 

It is a good thing too because the massive pain from the surgery made that pain dwarf any pain before the surgery.  I have had to learn so many things again like rolling over, sitting up and yes I am walking again!  I use a cane and I have to limit the amount of time on my feet but I am feeling stronger every day.  I am not going to get into the details of recovery from start to finish.  Much I don’t remember and what I do is something that will never leave my conscious mind both horrid and moving.

I have felt some flashes of my old pain just to keep my hope in check, but right now I am just enjoying the tradeoff of strong back pain versus complete body pain.  It is to me a miracle even if it leaves tonight and most certainly if it disappears forever.

Recovery is slow, painful and depressing.  I need those that don’t mind to drop me an email.  You can call but it is harder sometimes for me to gather myself for a meaningful call.  So yes, it is Andy again, asking for you.  I need you.  Forgive me if it takes time for me to respond but please know that whatever you do even if it is just to continue to quietly keep us in your thoughts and prayers I’ll take it faster than a Cinnabon at the food court.  Our financial needs have grown, but I can’t ask for anymore in good conscience.  Most have given more than they can and the debt seems growing and insurmountable.  Thanks for helpings us so far.  One step at a time will we get on our feet again someway, somehow, someday.  Let this moment just be a moment of thanks for my life floating up instead of sinking fast, if even for a season.

Much love to so many - Andy
Andy Barwick1 Comment